I feel as though people don’t fully understand what I mean when I try to explain the impact my clients have on me. Connection has always been something I’ve valued, so when I began my business, I knew it was something I wanted to carry with me into my work. I personally feel one of our main purposes here as human beings is to connect with one another and learn from the lived experiences of others as well as the shared experiences we have together. There’s so much to learn outside of ourselves, and as someone who most definitely struggled with hyper independence, I often must check in with myself and be sure I’m putting my ego aside and living in alignment with my core value to connect and learn from those around me.

And when it comes to my career as a photographer, I don’t speak of connection in the sense of chatting with my clients over shared interests during our shoot or recognizing we’re from the same side of the country in our first consult call. While those things can be fun, that is still the more surface level of connection I experience with my clients.

You know what? Instead of trying to explain further, I’ll instead just give you an example:

I met Lyndsey (yup, we have the same name but different spellings) back in the winter of last year. I took some early maternity photos for her, as she was expecting her first child in the coming months. The joy I could feel emanating from her about entering motherhood was palpable, and I couldn’t contain my excitement for the honor of being part of such a monumental time in her life.

As a woman myself, while I have no children, I recognize how pivotal of a chapter in a woman’s life it must be to make the choice to become a mother, and how transformational those nine months must feel leading up to bringing a child into this world. There must be so many feelings new mothers must be experiencing. Being able to photograph that magic of a woman becoming a mother is something I never take for granted.

After sending off Lyndsey’s final gallery and her expressing so much gratitude to me for capturing such an important time in her life, I sat with the joy of it all and then continued on. But her impact on my life didn’t end there.

Months later, Lyndsey reached back out, expressing she’d love to have some photos of her and her now four month old baby boy, Carson. Elated anytime a client of mine makes the decision to book with me again, I immediately got her on my schedule, excited to see how she’s been transitioning into motherhood and to meet this little human she created.

The day of our shoot came around, and as every human does every once in a while, I was having a bad day. And I mean a royally bad day, the kind where nothing could really turn it around (and trust me, I tried). It was one of those days where you just have to call your mom and let her hear you cry for no other reason than to be witnessed, because you know there’s nothing to do but let it out. And so that’s what I did, the entire way over to this shoot.

I had a few clients back to back this day, so I knew I had to pull it together pretty quickly. The clients began flowing in, and while the distraction of my job that I love so dearly helped ground me immensely, I was definitely not on the top of my game. And then, Lyndsey showed up.

I saw her pick baby boy Carson up out of the car and I felt my shoulders relax and a genuine smile crawl across my face. The relief of a familiar face excited to see me was a deep breath I didn’t know I needed. We went about the shoot, and it took so much within me to not burst into tears (happy ones this time) to see Lyndsey with this child that only months ago, I knew only as a little bump. I gave her the biggest hug and said goodbye to baby boy, and finished up the remainder of my shoots.

On my drive home afterwards, I settled back into my bad day state, relieved that I could take off the professionalism mask I felt I needed to wear that day and get home to rest. As I settled back into my grumpiness at home, already being a bit more disappointed that it was a Sunday and I couldn’t get my emotional support Chick-Fil-A, my phone buzzed and it was Lyndsey. I opened the message:

“Hi it’s other Lyndsey! I just wanted to say thank you so much for today! You’re such a bright light and I’m so thankful to have found you!”

Tears immediately resumed streaming down my face. To know that even on a day where I felt I couldn’t go any lower, the way I showed up meant something to someone. The way I showed up, even if I felt I wasn’t my best, was enough. More than enough, it brought light to someone’s life that day.

After wiping my tears, I chose to be a bit vulnerable with her and shared how I was having the most difficult day and that seeing her and the joy her baby boy brings her made my entire day just a little bit easier.

And just like that, the door was then open for her to be vulnerable with me as well. After sending Lyndsey some of her previews, she expressed to me that she was also going through a difficult time, and that these photos of her with her son truly brought her the hope and joy she needed to keep moving forward.

People need people. Even when you feel like the way you’re showing up isn’t “enough”, I promise you it is. And that was something I so desperately needed to understand at this time in my life when I felt almost embarrassed to keep showing up, because I couldn’t maintain this unrealistic expectation only I had of myself. What I didn’t realize is that’s when I lose my authenticity, my humanness.

“Why even bother showing up at all if I can’t show up perfectly,” I’d ask myself.

Lyndsey proved me wrong.

I don’t need to be perfect to be exactly what people need and to still be worth being loved and accepted in return. And that’s why connection is such a core value in the work that I do. I don’t think my clients know how many lessons they’ve truly gifted me about myself and how I want to show up in my life differently.

I might be capturing their lives, but they deeply change the trajectory of mine.